Returning, I could not force myself to get up to the room. Lay down on the couch in the empty living room - on the same with a lot of weeks ago opened her eyes after fainting. As then, all of a sudden seemed to me in a new light, but now I have shaken the fragility and transience of existence, rather than hidden in it the charm. How rapidly and catastrophically can all change ... Absorbed by their own experiences, I proshlyapil important lesson. Which, I think, it is that anything can happen at any time. Do not count on the patronage and protection of the surrounding reality, neither fight nor suffer, nor overcome - and it does not matter, you will gain in the end, happiness or not. I remembered a fun day Clara's birthday, when she felt that she stepped over the threshold and came to the promised land. There is no promised land. And there are thresholds. So, all in vain? Futility, too, but it's the least. The main thing is to find the courage to recognize the extreme precariousness of the world and yet the risk to benefit from the unlimited opportunities offered, albeit brief moment of life, breath of consciousness. He easily missed. The most difficult task - not overgrown with moss, to resist the routine when the same thing on an infinite range, Lucy said. Opened his eyes wider, look, recognize how all unusual, wonderful and terrible, every day, in every life. And it hurts too - when the eyes widen and conscious of their vulnerability and insignificance, their ignorance. But in suffering as Clara said, in the dark folds of the pain lurking mysterious and generous gifts. Hope and Chastity ... In the face of her sorrow, but I will not call her tragic life. The existence of inexplicable, a maze, where are intertwined terror and desire. Leo, daunted courage - no, not tamed, that's the essence - the lion, which has helped the courage to make friends. To which should be approached while he is awake. With respect and gratitude. Clara thought of it herself. In the twenty years.
A bogyósgyümölcskertész fia
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